You won't find one here.
Not that I'm not psyched for the start of baseball season. I'm just as excited as everyone else that pitchers and catchers reported today, signalling the start of spring training. It means we're only a month and a half away from games that count!
But tales of "emerald fields" and "azure skies" are a little overboard. No other sport romanticizes the start of training camp like baseball writers do. I think they do it on purpose to make their readers jealous that they are sitting in the sunshine while fans are still freezing their fannies off.
I get that for many, the day that pitchers and catchers report is the first glimpse of spring after a long, cold winter. And that the start of a new baseball season brings renewed hope that the local big league team can break out of its doldrums and finally start to look like a competitive club.
But in reality, it's just a bunch of ballplayers taking batting practice and trying to shake the rust out of their joints.
I know, I'm a curmudgeon.
RIGGS SPEAKS: Manager Jim Riggleman told the beat reporters today that as things stand now, Livan Hernandez would be the opening day starter "unless something unforeseen happens", and Nyjer Morgan and Ian Desmond would hit 1-2. He also said Jordan Zimmermann would be on an innings count, but did not know what that ceiling would be, in his first full season after Tommy John surgery.
UNIFORM CHANGES: Drew Storen will wear his sixth uniform number since making his Major League debut. He'll wear No. 22 after losing No. 25 to Adam LaRoche. Storen told reporters he hopes to have some way to make it up to fans that bought a No. 25 Storen jersey over the off-season.
Collin Balester scrapped No. 99 and will wear No. 23. Michael Morse will wear No. 38, as Jayson Werth's contract stipulates he gets No. 28, and Chris Marrero will wear No. 14.
I expect nothing less from you than these kind of sentiments. If we ever start winning, I hope you'll be able to sing songs of joy as well.
Good stuff and I got a chuckle out of this.